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School holidays and handovers: making arrangements work

Updated 14 October 2026 · About 7 minutes to read · Mainly England

Free tool: see your council's 2026 to 2027 school holidays and split them between two homes. No sign-up.

School holidays are often where co-parenting arrangements get tested. The regular weekly pattern stops, there are long summer weeks to cover, trips abroad to plan, and Christmas to share. Handovers can be tense at the best of times. This guide brings together the official rules you need to know and some practical ideas that many families find helpful.

Start with the right term dates

School term and holiday dates aren't the same everywhere. In England and Wales, gov.uk's school term dates page lets you find your local council's dates by postcode. Scotland and Northern Ireland have their own sites (mygov.scot and education-ni.gov.uk). [1] Academies and some other schools may set different dates from the council, so always check with your children's own school. It's surprisingly common for two children in one family to be at schools with different inset days.

Get the dates for the whole school year as early as you can, and put them into one shared calendar that you both use. Then plan the holidays before arguments have a chance to start.

Ways to share the holidays

There's no single right answer. The best arrangement is one that suits your children's ages, your work and the distance between your homes. Common patterns include:

• Half and half: each half-term or holiday split in the middle, with a handover at the halfway point.
• Alternating: one parent has the whole of October half-term, the other has February, and so on, swapping each year.
• Summer in blocks: one or two weeks at a time, which works well for holidays away. Very young children may cope better with shorter blocks.
• Christmas: some families split Christmas Eve and Christmas Day, some alternate Christmas and New Year each year, and some share Christmas Day itself. Our Christmas co-parenting schedules guide has worked examples.

Whatever you choose, write it down, including handover times. Agree a deadline each year for confirming summer plans (for example, by the end of March) so there's time to book holidays and childcare.

Holidays in term time: the rules

In England, you need to ask your child's school in advance for permission to take them out in term time. Gov.uk says that a holiday is generally not considered an exceptional circumstance. [2]

If a child misses school without permission, the council can issue a penalty notice to each parent. The fine is £80, rising to £160 if it isn't paid within 21 days. A second notice within three years is £160. From the 2024 to 2025 school year, a parent can get no more than two penalty notices for the same child in three years. After that, the council may consider other action, including prosecution. [3]

For separated parents, that means a term-time trip planned by one parent can affect the other. Talk about it before anything is booked.

Taking children abroad

Gov.uk is clear: you need permission from everyone with parental responsibility for a child, or from a court, before taking them abroad. Taking a child abroad without permission is child abduction. There's an exception: if a child arrangements order says the child lives with you, you can usually take them abroad for up to 28 days without asking, unless another court order says otherwise. [4] Our guide can I take my child abroad without the other parent's consent? covers this in more detail, including consent letters and passports.

Gov.uk suggests that a letter from each person with parental responsibility is usually enough to show you have permission, giving their contact details and the trip details. It also suggests taking the child's birth certificate, and a marriage or divorce certificate if your surname is different from your child's. [4] Practical tips:

• Share the full itinerary, flights and accommodation address in writing.
• Agree how and when the children will call home.
• Give plenty of notice, especially for long trips or school holidays.
• If you can't agree, gov.uk explains you can ask a court to decide. [4]

Calmer handovers

Handovers are the moments children often remember most. Cafcass, the service that represents children in family courts in England, suggests agreeing ground rules for meetings such as handovers, and never using your child as a messenger. [5] It also says children's exposure to rows and ongoing conflict can cause them significant emotional harm, so discuss serious issues where your child can't overhear. [7] Our guide to child handover arrangements has more ideas and a checklist you can copy.

Other ideas that many families find help:

• Keep it short and warm. A quick, friendly goodbye helps children move between homes.
• Sort the logistics in writing beforehand, so the handover itself doesn't need a conversation.
• Use a neutral place if doorstep handovers are difficult, such as school pick-up or a public place. If contact is very strained, parallel parenting may help.
• Be on time, and say early if you're running late.
• Pass on important information calmly, such as medicine given or a bump at football, ideally in a message rather than in front of the children.
• Let your child take the things they need, such as schoolwork, PE kit or a phone, and keep a "travelling bag" checklist for things that go between homes.

If handovers aren't safe or are too difficult

Child contact centres offer safe, neutral places for children to spend time with a parent or to be handed over. The National Association of Child Contact Centres (NACCC) has a search tool to find a centre near you. [6] If you're worried about anyone's safety, talk to a specialist service. See our free help guide, and if anyone is in danger, call 999.

When plans need to change

Things come up: a grandparent's birthday, a work trip, a school show. A simple, agreed way to ask for a change helps a lot:

• Ask in writing, with as much notice as you can.
• Explain briefly why, and suggest a swap if you can.
• Reply promptly, even if the answer is "let me check and get back to you by Thursday".
• Confirm what's agreed in writing, so you both have the same record.

If you keep disagreeing about holidays, a family mediator can help you build a longer-term plan. Our parenting plan checklist has a section on holidays and special days.

Sources

1. Gov.uk, School term and holiday dates: gov.uk/school-term-holiday-dates
2. Gov.uk, School attendance and absence: gov.uk/school-attendance-absence
3. Gov.uk, Legal action to enforce school attendance: gov.uk/school-attendance-absence/legal-action-to-enforce-school-attendance
4. Gov.uk, Taking your child abroad: gov.uk/permission-take-child-abroad
5. Cafcass, Communicating with your child's other parent during separation: cafcass.gov.uk
6. National Association of Child Contact Centres: naccc.org.uk
7. Cafcass, Communicating with your child's other parent after separation: cafcass.gov.uk

All sources checked on 8 October 2026.