HandoverhubWhat is a parenting plan? With a free template
This is general information, not legal advice. If you're thinking about a court application, or there are safety concerns, get advice for your situation. See our free help list.
A parenting plan is a written agreement between parents about how you'll bring up your children across two homes: where they'll live and when, how you'll communicate, how you'll handle school, health, holidays and money, and what you'll do when things change. It's not a legal document. It's a practical tool that helps you both know what's been agreed and gives the children some predictability.
Free official tools you can use
- Cafcass "Our Child's Plan". Cafcass, the service that represents children in family courts in England, has a free online tool for making a parenting plan. It used to be called the Parenting Plan. There's a Word version if you can't use the online tool, and you don't need a referral. It also has a child-friendly version, which can only be downloaded if the other parent agrees. [1] You can start it at planningtogether.cafcass.gov.uk/plan.
- Gov.uk "child arrangements plan". Gov.uk has its own online service for making a plan together. Gov.uk is clear that any plan made with the service is not legally binding, and either parent can suggest changes. [2]
Cafcass says judges and magistrates are likely to expect parents to have made a plan if a case does go to court. [1] Even if you never go near a court, a plan written while things are calm can save a lot of arguments later.
A parenting plan isn't a court order
A parenting plan only works as long as you both stick to it. If you want an agreement to be legally binding, gov.uk explains that you can ask the court to approve it as a consent order. A draft is signed by both parents and sent to the court, and it's usually approved without a hearing. [2]
If you can't agree, either parent can apply for a court order using form C100. Gov.uk lists three main types: a child arrangements order (where a child lives and who they spend time with; see child arrangements orders explained), a specific issue order (for example, which school a child goes to) and a prohibited steps order (for example, stopping a trip abroad). It costs £270 to apply, and you may be able to get help with fees. [3] In most cases you'll need to go to a mediation information meeting (a MIAM) first. See our mediation guide.
What to put in your plan
Cafcass suggests covering communication, who looks after the children and when, living arrangements, education, health, time with wider family and special occasions, and everyday things like activities and house rules. [1] Keep it about the children, write it in plain language, and be specific where arguments are likely.
A few principles that help:
- Think about the children's needs first, at their ages now, not about what feels fair between the adults.
- Be specific about times and places. "Alternate weekends" is good; "every other Friday from 4pm, collected from school, to Sunday 6pm at Mum's" is better.
- Agree how changes are asked for, and how much notice you'll give.
- Plan a review. Children's needs change quickly. A review every six or twelve months, or at a change of school, keeps the plan useful.
- Talk to the children in an age-appropriate way about the parts that affect them, without making them choose.
Free parenting plan checklist
Use this checklist alongside the Cafcass or gov.uk tool, or on its own to structure a conversation. Copy it into a document and fill in what you agree. Leave anything you haven't agreed yet marked "to discuss".
1. Communication
- How we'll contact each other about the children (one app or channel, so nothing gets lost). Our communication tips can help you agree ground rules.
- Reasonable times to message, and how quickly we'll each try to reply.
- What counts as urgent, and how we'll tell each other about it.
- We won't pass messages through the children.
2. Where the children live and when
- The regular pattern (for example, alternate weekends plus one weeknight).
- Handover times and places, and who does pick-ups and drop-offs (see child handover arrangements).
- What we'll do if one of us is running late.
- How we ask for a swap, and how much notice we'll give.
3. School holidays and special days
- How we'll split half-terms, Easter, summer and Christmas (see example Christmas schedules).
- Birthdays (the children's and ours), Mother's Day and Father's Day, religious festivals.
- Holidays abroad: how much notice we'll give, and sharing the itinerary (see taking a child abroad).
4. Education
- Both of us on the school's contact list; who goes to parents' evenings.
- Homework, reading and school kit across both homes.
- How we'll decide on things like school choice and clubs.
5. Health
- GP and dentist details, and both of us registered as contacts.
- How we'll share news of illness, injuries, medicines and appointments.
- Who can consent to routine treatment, and how we'll tell each other.
6. Money
- Child maintenance: a private arrangement or the CMS (see our costs guide).
- How we'll share extras such as uniform, trips, clubs and phones, and the amount above which we agree first.
- How and when we'll settle up, and sharing receipts.
7. Everyday life
- Bedtimes, screen time and phones: the things worth keeping similar in both homes.
- New partners: when and how they'll be introduced (see introducing a new partner).
- Contact with grandparents and wider family.
8. When things change
- When we'll review the plan.
- What we'll do if we disagree (for example, try mediation before anything else).
If you can't agree
Cafcass says ongoing conflict is bad for both parents and children, and that children benefit from time with both parents unless there are exceptional reasons not to. [4] If talking directly isn't working, family mediation can help you build a plan together, and you may be able to get up to £500 towards it. Read our guide to mediation and the voucher scheme.
If there has been domestic abuse, a shared plan or joint mediation may not be safe or appropriate. Specialist services can help you think it through: see our free help guide. If you're in danger, call 999.
Quick answers
Is a parenting plan legally binding?
No. A parenting plan only works as long as you both stick to it. If you want an agreement to be legally binding, you can ask the court to approve it as a consent order.
Is there an official parenting plan template in the UK?
In England, Cafcass has a free online tool called Our Child's Plan, with a Word version, and gov.uk has an online service for making a child arrangements plan together. Our checklist on this page can be used alongside either.
What should a parenting plan include?
Cafcass suggests covering communication, who looks after the children and when, living arrangements, education, health, time with wider family and special occasions, and everyday things like activities and house rules.
Keeping to the plan, week by week
Handoverhub is a free co-parenting app with a shared calendar that knows school holidays in England, Wales and Scotland, change requests you both agree, and messages that neither of you can edit or delete. It can help you both see what's been agreed. Find out more.
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Sources
- Cafcass, How a parenting plan can help (Our Child's Plan): cafcass.gov.uk
- Gov.uk, Make a child arrangements plan: gov.uk/looking-after-children-divorce/make-child-arrangements-plan
- Gov.uk, Apply for a court order: gov.uk/looking-after-children-divorce/apply-for-court-order
- Cafcass, Mediation and dispute resolution: cafcass.gov.uk
- Gov.uk, Making child arrangements if you divorce or separate: gov.uk/looking-after-children-divorce
- Advicenow, How to apply for a child arrangements order without a lawyer: advicenow.org.uk